Details of a Wandering Mind

I have a problem. I have a wandering mind.

It's not that I wouldn't like to dwell on things sometimes, but it is very hard for me. I just forget about what I should be doing. And yes, my mom has suggested Ritalin to me several times.

Tonight Christin asked me to go out to her car and get the recycle garbage can out of her car. On the way out she told me to take the garbage to the dumpster as well. The following is my mind dialogue;

"Usually I only take the garbage over when I throw it on top of my car. That is such an energy saver. When did I get that idea? When I bought my Camry of course. I wonder if I would have thought of that if I only had my Cadillac. I wonder if it would scratch it or just make it dirty. I'm so glad I have that car. Sometimes older cars are fun, even if just to beat up on. I should light that car on fire one day, that would be a good memorial to her. Or jump it off a cliff! That would be awesome. I wonder where you could jump a car off. Hollywood people do it somewhere. They clean it up after I bet. I wonder if Google has the answer. Google is so great."

By this time I reached the door. And yes, I definitely had forgotten the entire reason I went out in the first place, which was to get the recycle bin. I drive myself crazy sometimes.

Well-Rounded

Things that make me feel well-rounded; getting a new Ryobi drill from Santa Claus and a new pair of hair cutting shears from Mrs. Claus. And I couldn't be more excited for the two.

Lotion In My Flan

For years Christin has had her Williams-Sonoma Healthy Kitchen cookbooks. Since she bought them she has been dying to try lavender flan. Not that she had ever tasted flan, but she did think it sounded fun.

I decided I would make it for her birthday. So Tuesday I went to the one store that I know of that sells fresh lavender and bought some. I hid it and snuck it to Bullhead City. I made it while keeping Christin out of the kitchen. Then it had to set for EIGHT HOURS! So we had to wait til today. It was pretty good. But very pretty. And Christin liked it (even if my mom didn't nearly as much). And my aunt said it tasted like there was lotion in her flan. But she liked it too.

Every Light In The House Is On

Every year John Vizzard spends the entire month of December in fear. "Why?" you ask yourself. I will tell you. John is terrified of houses burning down all around him. And the Carbiener family does not help with this.

Christin began to put lights on the Christmas tree this year since I was out of town for a few weeks. John was there at the time. Christin managed to put three hundred lights on the tree but only covered about the bottom foot (I am told). She seemed a little distraught and tried again, yielding very similar results. Now normally my sister would have gone and bought more lights as a solution. However John would absolutely not have this. Not entirely because his responsible self would consider it a waste of money to buy new lights, not to mention the extra electricity, but because he is terrified of this tree catching on fire if too many lights are used. So he put on the lights, and yes, they look very nice.

Bridget on the other hand does not worry about such things. What she does hate though is our icicle lights. Every year I climb around the furniture in my living room with my staple gun and hang hundreds of them. And I love it. It makes it feel very Christmasy and for just a moment I forget that it is seventy-five degrees outside.


And every night when I go to bed with those lights plugged in I wonder if I shut off the lamps in the living room because it so stinkin' bright. And it's awesome. I actually think of this song every single night.


So even though John unplugs my Christmas tree every night when he leaves just to have me go right back out and plug it in again, and Bridget thinks we're a little more white trash for having those lights up inside, I love it. I'm grateful for Christmas and especially for our disapproving friends.

Now why was I in Utah? Well Bridget had a little surgery. So I came up to play nurse for a week and a half. So we hung out and even though we didn't build a fort, go to the movies, or go ice skating, I did take this picture of her. And we had a very nice drive to the doctor way too many times in a week. And sewed way too many buttons on blankets. But it was honestly a great week.

Before

After

Burger Supreme deliciousness

A sure fire way to make sure no one wants to break into your locked box

The kittens keeping a very close eye on me while I read the scriptures. Yes, they laid on top of each other exactly like that for a half an hour.

The lake driving through Provo Canyon

And just cause I think she deserves a sexy not surgery picture.

A Day That Will Live in Infamy

A little dramatic you might ask?

In case anybody missed the news, Carrie Underwood will soon be Carrie Underwood Fisher. Yep, she said yes. I know, right? It really is that bad.



I might have not been able to buy a quarter million dollar ring, but I still think she made the wrong choice.

Guess this means I might have to start dating soon.

Half-Done Projects

I have been feeling very creative as of late. I have six or seven things in my mind or that I am currently working on. The problem is they're not done yet. And what kind of lame blog post would have pictures of half-finished projects? So instead you get the post telling you that in a few weeks there will be a lot of awesomeness on here.

Mistborn

Jane talked about her brother being an author for quite some time. Every time I asked what her brother did actually, since he's been doing it since I met Jane. I never really thought much of reading one of his books though. I found one in Barnes and Noble a few months ago and thought how cool it was that I had met this author. But then I took a trip to the library and got one of his books. Maybe just to get on Jane's good side.

I checked out the only book of his that Phoenix had at the time, which was book two of a trilogy. It didn't seem like a big deal, as I didn't actually think I would like it that much. Turns out I was wrong. I read that book in about a week (I had a lot of work in Yuma). I then began the search for the next one. Six hours or so into my search I had visited three libraries and called another before I found a copy (they all said they had it in). I arrived at Scottsdale to have the woman that was holding it tell me that the author downstairs was Brandon Sanderson doing a book signing. Yep. That's him.


As I had been texting Jane all day telling her about the experience, I had to call and tell her "Thank You" for telling me her brother was in Phoenix. And no I didn't go buy a book. And I didn't wait in line cause I felt like a lame fan who hadn't read anything of his until the previous week. So I left.

I think I am going to be going to church with him on Sunday in Provo though. Yep, I'll distract him the whole stinkin' time with questions about his books.

They are awesome though. I read the first one finally. And Kate Beckinsale could probably be Vin (tough little protagonist) if it were made into a movie. Which it should be.

AOL News

AOL has some great news that always pops up when I check my e-mail. Tonight was particularly good. A few things I explored tonight.

The World's Scariest Train Rides (also very beautiful)

Christmas street display at XOXO store in Manhattan has girls living in a pretend room that change clothes for everyone periodically

Unfortunately I have a reason to dislike USC slightly less. Crap.



Awesome Parenting

Best Christmas Jewelry Commercial Ever

The sad thing is that I'm probably the guy that would make that card...
I guess it's cheaper.

Oh Carrie

Whoa.

When You Just Want Chocolate Cake

You know what I hate? When Christin buys a basil plant and some of the potting soil spills onto the counter. Turns out it looks but does not taste like chocolate cake at all.

Someone to Appreciate the Sunshine

A few weeks ago I got a text that read something like "Betsy has officially ended the shortest relationship of her life. Phoenix here I come!"

"Who's Betsy?" you ask. Well how about we rewind a few years.

Back in the day I worked for Icon Security. My very first summer I left Arizona for New Jersey, happy to leave as I didn't really have any friends to miss. Work went well and I was staying busy, working in a place called Jersey City (one of the most scary places you may EVER visit in your life). One night we were particularly busy. I had a job to go to, as well as one next door when I finished.

It should have been easy. Should have been. However, the phone mysteriously shut off. Yes, the phone for the entire house. Except for the kitchen phone. By this point I had been doing security for about seven months. I had installed a little over a hundred systems. I knew what I was doing. The phone box was completely dead.

I spent the next hour and a half going out of my mind trying to find the phone in their house with a Hispanic woman following me around telling me that I was ruining everything. She was getting increasingly frustrated, as well as I, and I kind of exploded on her. In Spanish. It's probably the only time I've ever spoken anything angrily in Spanish in my life.

Miraculously the phone kicked on around ten. It just started working again. Just because. Excited to finally leave the house I hurry and finish. Moments before I leave in walks her daughter. This is Betsy. Who I find out is only two months older than me, and, crazy hot. This is getting very long but we became friends. She wanted to know a little more about the Mormon church so we got together and talked about it. And went to Six Flags with her church group. And went to the Museum of Natural History. Since that time, I stop by and see her whenever I get a chance.

So two years later she comes to Arizona. And we go to Waffle House, as neither of us had ever been there before. And that is where she wanted to go after traveling across the country. In the morning we got ready and went to Mexico. She had never been and I figured it would make a nice day trip. We ate tacos, went to the beach, tried to go horseback riding but the guy left us hanging, and then we came home.




We slept in a little on Saturday, then she laid out by the pool (I haven't seen someone so excited to see the sun for a long time), and after some shopping we went out to eat at this crazy Greek restaurant. And by crazy I mean complete with a band, group dancing, a belly dancer, and plate smashing.


She had her first go of Mormon church. They were nice meetings and she liked it okay. Then we came home and she laid out by the pool again, took a nap, and then we went for a drive to see a little more of the Valley of the Sun. When we got home Christin and I made dinner and I took her to the airport.

It is funny how we can reflect back on the events in our life and see things from a different perspective. I remember how upset I was at the time that the phone didn't work, and it probably cost me a hundred dollars, but if things had gone smoothly I would have never met Betsy. Even though I've only seen her a few days of my life, I would never trade the friendship we have. I feel very lucky to have a friend like her.

Brownies and Carnies

I found out that Lady Antebellum was coming to Phoenix for the state fair a few weeks ago. I bought myself a pair of tickets and Vanie and I went. Vanie is a beautiful "brownie" (a term that I don't think I've ever heard before from a Mexican), and she is awesome.

Before the concert I had to have a taste of the carnival goodie deliciousness. I can't remember the last time I had a funnel cake, and this one didn't disappoint. Maybe I'll try making them sometime.


If it could get any better after that, it did. The concert was so awesome. It was different because they were the only band and they only have one album. So they played six or seven of their songs and then four or five of other people. I don't know if the two lead singers have ever dated. I'm not sure if there is actually chemistry between them. But they are two very sexy people, which can be mistaken for people with chemistry. Anyways.


After I had a fried Snickers for my first time, we rode the ferris wheel for my first time in maybe fifteen years, played a few games, people watched, and had a snow cone. It was a great night.

Venturing Out. And Up!

I know I have a lot of other stuff to write about. But for the moment we will get this out here.

I really didn't want to go out this weekend. It just didn't feel fun. Maybe I was feeling sorry for myself cause I don't have any "bros" to go hang out with. Maybe I was just feeling too lazy to put the energy into a costume. Whatever the reason I didn't want to leave my house. Even to check out the millions of sexy half naked girls that would be walking around Tempe.

But last night I decided I needed to go do something as I was sent five or six party invites. I called my friend Tom and we ended up going to this bonfire. Which was actually really chill and pretty fun.

I spent most of today watching football and working on my car, internally debating on what I was going to make of my evening. I thought a little about Party Boy but Candice told me that would be lame. I thought about Balloon Boy but my mom told me that would be lame. Christin and I decided to go to Party City to attempt it anyways but I came up with another idea. So we bought a few things. We came home.

And I drew.


And I drew some more.


And I cut.
And I punched holes.
And I tied.
And a costume was born.


With The Most Interesting Man in the World and Goldilocks.


I have never been so popular at a party before. Everybody thought I was awesome and random sexy girls wanted their picture with me (I actually solicited this one though, at Christin's request). Yep. I had such a good time maybe I'll even go out again next year.

Guilt

Facebook will now not only request friends, but they will also guilt you into thinking you are neglecting your current ones. See example A.

A Little Self-Conscious

Maybe my favorite thing about Arizona is the weather. I love that it is warm all of the time, and I love that right now I can drive with my windows down all day during almost all of the fall/winter months. For guys this raises a little bit of a dilemma though. See, I enjoy a lot of music. I know it shouldn't matter, but I am not always okay with everyone else knowing what I am listening to. For example: most love songs, anything performed by a girl, or anything more than thirty years old. I know it shouldn't matter but it does. So until I find a good solution to this or get over my image problems, I'll just keep rolling up my windows or turning down my music at stoplights. Or anytime anyone is driving close to me.

Time

There's something interesting about time.
It has this unique ability to form connections.

In the book The Tipping Point by Malcolm Gladwell it discusses the idea that very few friends actually became friends because of common interests. They became friends because of proximity; they just spent a lot of time together.

In the case of me and my friend Bryan, that is very much true. We hated each other. The first time that I remember meeting him I got mad cause he was joking around and grabbed the Mountain Dew out of my locker. Well the next day he tried to fight me. I snuck out of it. Whew. A year later I joined the football team, something that put us feet away from each other for two or three hours a day. He is now the closest thing I have to a brother.

In dating this is often the case as well. You spend time around someone, you learn to appreciate the good and bad about them, and suddenly you feel a little empty when this person is no longer around. As Billy Ocean says, "you wake up and suddenly you're in love."

Even though romantic feelings never had time to properly develop, I spent some time in Van Horn, Texas, this summer. With the exception of my motel, I spent more time in the city park than anywhere else. Though it is blocked by a bush, there is a nice bench in this park. It is there that I read most of Malcolm Gladwell's book Blink.



Even though I wasn't there under the best circumstances, I'm glad that I got to spend some time in Van Horn. I know that the next time I drive east past El Paso I'll be happy to see the Van Horn sign. I might even get off and take a reading break there on my bench.

It's So Much Better Toasted

Toasting my bread today for the second time after it came out only slightly warm, I thought, "I hate toasters." The thing is, it was a great idea. For some reason though they are the most inconsistent pieces of culinary equipment ever commercially produced. It seems they always toast the bread not nearly enough. Unless of course you turn the knob a fraction of an inch clockwise. Then you will have the charred remains of your slice of bread that only my mother, grandfather, or Teri Hatcher would eat.

How much does it cost to get a good toaster? I bought one for $7 once at Walmart and I held a grudge against them for months. I think I actually should have been paid to use such garbage. My sister has one that was probably $40 and performs only slightly better. My parents have yet a more expensive one, which approaches the tipping point of a toaster worth owning. I decided to do a little research and I found out exactly how much you need to spend to get a decent toaster.



Now you need to link here to read about it.

I know, right? That's how you'll know when I make it one day friends. I will have that beautiful $379.95 toaster sitting in my kitchen. We could even talk about it over toast and jam if you come visit me.

My Love For California . . .

... well isn't really there. I can't actually tell you how much I enjoy any joke made about my neighboring state. So thanks Craig.

Dating Disclaimers

When it comes to dating I think that I'm open to different types of girls. I don't feel like I judge too harshly. That is with the exception of three things: lower back tattoos, the SAW movies, and country music.

1) I hate lower back tattoos. I think it is incredibly trashy. This will almost surely eliminate all chances of me dating a girl.
2) I think the SAW movies are disgusting. I know our world is a little bad, but I am still a little amazed that the movie has made enough money to now be coming out with the SIXTH in the series. Gross. I instantly think less of someone that has watched one of them.
3) I love country music. And not liking it is HUGE. This might actually be the most important.

Anyways. That's my thought for the day.

They're Still Dirty

No, not my parents. Even though they kinda are. No, I'm talking about my shirts. Tyler and Ariana thought that the shirts that I had in my laundry basket were clean. So they just hung them up. Whew.

Haircuts and Hangers

Over the course of my life there have two major sources of contention in my household: hair and clothes. Given most of these resulted between my mom and sister, we have all learned to tread lightly when approaching these subjects. For this reason my father almost never does laundry. It's not that he wouldn't like to do it to help my mom (he is a pretty good husband), but he does it wrong. He's colorblind and just tends to do it wrong. He just has to fill in elsewhere. This is why I almost always do my own laundry and cut my own hair. I am terrified that I am going to have someone give me a bad haircut and then I will be mad at them. I can't handle that pressure.

Changing gears a little, I am a little anal retentive about some things. This has substantially decreased over the years, but it's still there. It directs an awful lot of what I do on a day to day basis. One of those things is my closet. I hate that in so many closets there are fifty different shapes and colors of hangers. I have one. Black. Just black. I will throw away anything else that sneaks it's way in.

And the last thing, I decided a little while ago that I wouldn't wash any of my shirts until I wore everything that I have hanging up in my closet. It has been not quite two months I think, but yesterday was the last day, I wore the last one.

Yesterday was also my birthday, I am now twenty-five. It was a good enough birthday, and I came home early to catch Ariana and Tyler in my room (luckily they were behaving...). They left me some M&M's in my room and stuff. I thought that that was all until I walked into my closet this morning. All of my shirts were washed and hanging up.

Now I know I should be thinking, "That's so nice of them," which did go through my head, but what I really am thinking is, "Did you dry all of my t-shirts?" I am terrified that all my shirts shrunk. I know they didn't have time to hang dry them, and none of those shirts had ever seen a dryer previously. It is almost more than I can do to not think about it. And they are now all on pink hangers. Which I can switch.

Anyways I feel bad cause I know I should be grateful and I know they were trying to be nice. But it is almost too much for me to even look into my closet right now. I am just a little worried...

They've Gone Country...Dancing

Mesa, Arizona doesn't actually have anything close to a Honky Tonk. Especially not anything as cool as Billy Bob's in Ft Worth. They do have quite a few people my age that do attempt to country dance though.

Last night I went for my third time. I have gone about every six months since I found out about this, and I haven't enjoyed it very much. There is a girl that really wanted me to go with her last week (I didn't), but this week I decided I would give it another go. I have to say, I really enjoyed it. A few of the really good dancers took some time and showed us some fun things we could do. I even flipped a few girls. One of the girls had to spin around in a half circle leaning back, with me holding her up by only her neck. I'm pretty sure she tripped (I really don't think this was my fault), and fell about a foot to the ground. She was fine, she didn't hit her head or get hurt or anything, but I still felt bad for it. And of course everyone thought it was my fault. Oh well. I still had way more fun than I ever had before. Maybe week I will even go again.

We're Off to See the Wizard

As I was driving Christin to work today she started telling me about how Brigette, her boss, was going to see The Wizard of Oz tonight. It was the 70th (that's right, the 70th!!) anniversary of it so they were having special showings. I really didn't think it was that big of a deal, but then Christin started talking about how it was such a cool thing because no one in our generation has ever seen it in a movie theater. And just like that I am looking for tickets when I get home. So my friend Starlee and I went.

Even though I am sure I have watched the movie in its entirety before, I really didn't remember most of it. It was a lot like my first time seeing it, almost like a new release for me. And it was great. I enjoyed it quite a bit more than I thought I was going to. Maybe I'll even save my ticket stub.

Ambient Noise

Living with Christin is never exactly quiet. She is not someone that has often been described as quiet. By her own admission, I know that her laugh is so loud it sometimes scares her (and half of the theater that went to see X-Men: Origins).

Recently she has started school. What I am realizing is I need some noise. If she is reading, the house is quiet. She is not talking very often, and honestly, things seem all kinds of wrong. I am finding myself trying to play more music, but the music is very annoying/distracting to her. Luckily I just tried out Andrea Bocelli, and I think it's a winner. Whew! For both of us.

What Happened to the Doughnuts?

I have not had doughnuts at a church function for way too long. Sunday I had had enough. After the fireside I found a girl that I used to have institute with and we went home to make them. And I am going to say that for a first attempt (or a twentieth), yep, they came out amazing.

It's Good to Know She Cares

My sisters and I laugh probably a little more than we should occasionally over some of the advice our mom gives us. Recently, my mom called and told us that when we change our air filter we should wear a mask so we don't breathe it in the dust and stuff. So. I did.

Caution: Parents Learning to Text

You know how they make all of these bumper stickers about your kids turning sixteen and how you need to stay off the road? Sometimes I feel that they need to make similar ones for when your parents are trying to jump on to the "new technology" bandwagon. For example;

My father has recently got his first phone with a texting plan. He has probably sent half a dozen messages and seems to be handling it okay. The other day I even showed him how T9 works. The thing I maybe didn't explain quite so well is that proof reading is very helpful when using this option. I received this message from him yesterday;

"I need to he there wrencher are yours or tolloans."

I am usually pretty good at deciphering messages, but this one was a little out of my league. After listening to his voicemail I realized it was supposed to read;

"I need to know if these wrenches are yours or Tollmans."

At least he's trying, right? Keep it up dad.

My New Crush

I'm really just wanting to post so this is what you get.

Chuck, well, it's my new favorite show. It's one of the most amazing things that has been on tv for quite some time. I am a little sad that not more people know about this.

The point, if there is any point to this, is that this Yvonne girl (CIA agent Sarah Walker) makes the show even better. I mean, she's giving Carrie a run for her money.

If Sarcasm Ruled the World

Courtesy of cracked.com.











There are a few that need to be added, but they need to be slightly edited to make appropriate for my blog.

It's Good to Be Us

Nothing really big happened today. I just drove around Phoenix and hung out with a new friend. It was super low-key, but it was really one of the best days I have had for quite a while.

Fun That I Wish I Had

Sometimes I wish my life was a little more like this. Minus the alcohol.

Te llevaré al cielo - Mana
Uploaded by psyque. - See the latest featured music videos.

And Now Comes Allison

So February 12th I decided I was going to write little blog posts about the girls that live over in that condo, and I typed this up. But I didn't have a picture. Now I have a video.

So now you can meet Allison (even though she hasn't lived there for a few months).

Allison really likes to ride horses. She works on one of those ranches for troubled kids. She says that they're not supposed to ask them why they are there. I don't really think that I could help myself. But I'm kinda nosy. She has the same computer as me, though I got a way sweeter deal on mine than she did on hers. She is graduating in three semesters with a bachelor's in music therapy. She got a note on her bike one day from a police officer cause she's a rebel and chains up her bike where she shouldn't. She changed wards a few months ago when she moved into a different house, which is kinda sad. The good news is that I still get to see her from time to time, though not nearly as often as I would like to. Oh yeah, and she is awesome at the violin. And just in case you don't believe me;

"Just Keep Swimming" (Nemo)

I grew up swimming almost everyday of my life. No I never took lessons, but I can swim okay. I went cliff jumping with some friends today. This is really one of my favorite activities. I love it. Then there arose the suggestion to swim to the other side of the reservoir.

Now I am in Idaho for the week. The water here is not exactly as warm as Arizona. I am also in less than good shape. I might have a little muscle tone, but as far as aerobic exercise goes I fall short.

You put these things together, along with my mediocre swimming ability, and that is one very tough half mile to swim. Well, I didn't drown. I did however puke my guts out when I got to the other side. And then lay on the rocks for twenty minutes before I trusted myself to walk back to the other side. It's funny that this morning the cliff was what I was worried about.

It's Miller Time

Yesterday two of my best friends ever got married. Tyler and Ariana said there "I do's" and they were pronounced man and wife. Yes I wanted to ask for the box of tissues at the ceremony, but since neither mother cried at all, I had to man up. Even though I almost lost it when they walked in, I happened to sit in the closest seat which unfortunately kept me from seeing either of their faces during the ceremony, and that was probably the only thing that saved me. Whew.

It was an interesting experience cause even though I have been to three of my friends' weddings I haven't been around them during any of the dating process. This was different. Not only was I around them this time, I was very close to both the bride and groom. I think someone would have a hard time arguing that anyone knew the relationship better than me (outside of the bride and groom). Not to mention I love them more than anyone else.



It was funny to me though the reactions that I received. More than once people asked if I was family, and when I answered no, followed with, "Oh, so you're a friend of the groom." Cause that's what guys at weddings are, right? The funny thing is, a member of Tyler's family chimed in with, "Oh, that's Brad," as if no further explanation was needed. The exact phrase left the mouth of a member of Ariana's family a few minutes later to answer the question. I suppose I have been to family reunions, cousin's weddings, grandmother's birthdays, brother's homecomings, taken family Christmas pictures, and helped arrange pecans for pie night. So when I hear, "Oh that's Brad," it really seems like the best answer.

I am so happy for these two. I don't think there could be a better match for them. I'm so glad that they are married.

And that they are out of the mushy engagement period finally. Bleh.

Wake Up Call

I really like that Bridget will call and ask for me to give her a wake up call if I am still up at four. Yes, in the morning. Though I am suffering from a bit of insomnia at the moment, I don't plan on being up for another two and a half hours. But I really appreciate her asking me.

The Most Amazing Piñata Ever. And Tyler's Bachelor Party.

I went sex store shopping with Arianne today. It was pretty awesome. Turns out there a few real dirty stores in Tempe. Fascinations is a nice one. John says it's "family friendly". Anyways, it was a good time.

The highlight of the day was Phoenix Ranch Market. I figured the biggest Mexican store in the world would have a big piñata. That was a good hunch. Yes, I got this for $25. And yes, he's really that big.



The party ended up great, though I was really nervous about it. I wasn't sure who would show up and how it would go. Like nine guys showed up and we had a home run derby and grilled some burgers. Then Tyler smashed Ranchie (that's the name of the giant bull piñata, Phoenix Ranch Market's mascot).